Friday, February 11, 2011


Since the beginning of January, Jonathan has been working the night shift. It has been really weird and kinda hard making the transition. It makes it so that I don't get to see him that much, which has been really sad :( Everything is a bit off in our home since he's been on this shift, but one small blessing that comes from it is that it frees up my evenings a little bit to do things I wouldn't do otherwise.

One of those things is a sewing class that I've been taking. My dear mother-in-law bought me a sewing machine for Christmas. I cried. I couldn't believe that she would get me one! The cool thing is that her mother-in-law (Jona's Grandma, Memaw) got her one after she married Jona's dad, so apparently its turning into a tradition of sorts. The tradition will end with me though because if I ever have boys they aren't allowed to get married... Just kidding. ;)

I went to Beverly's, which is literally a block away from my house, to pick up some supplies and saw that they had sign ups for a beginner's sewing class. After I signed up, I learned that a sweet woman I knew from Master's was teaching the class! Perfect!

I just finished the last week of the beginner class and it was a total blast. I learned a lot and I can't wait for the next one (it starts Monday, if anyone is interested, I highly recommend it!). We learned how to make pajama pants and how to work on basic patterns. I don't have any pictures of my pants because I look pretty awful in them, but I do have some pictures of a dress that I just finished for Pen.

Here is a picture of the pattern...

The thing I love about this pattern is that it's easy breezy and it's reversible. I posted these pictures on facebook and a friend commented that it's a perfect dress for a baby because if they spill something on it you can just turn it inside out. That is exactly why I made it. :)

The flip side (Penny being a weirdo)

One second she loved the dress...

The next second not so much...

The Last Couple of Months...

I have to admit, it was really hard to sit down to try to blog tonight. I have tried several times in the last month but I just really haven't felt like it. I haven't really known what to say. The last couple of months take the cake for the most painful time of my life. There have been a lot of tears shed and a lot of prayers that have, at times, seemed like they are bouncing off the ceiling. There were several different issues that contributed to this season, but I think a lot of it was caused by my own sin.

I got to a place where I felt so angry I just wanted to run away from everything and never come back either that or kill everyone (that was a joke :)). I was desperately seeking to take control of my life when all I needed to do was relinquish control. I know this all sounds rather dramatic, but truthfully, it was pretty awful.

God used so many different things to break me over and over again. My precious husband, my parents, my in-laws, HIS WORD... He took away things and people that I valued so highly and replaced them with Himself. It has been painful, but its also been incredibly sweet.

It was really interesting for a while. I felt so incredibly alone for a several weeks, which was weird. My husband is never too busy to listen or to hold me but I just couldn't communicate my heart to him. I also have some of the most sympathetic, kind, selfless friends and I felt like I just couldn't get them to help me. Not for their lack of trying, but just because I felt like I couldn't connect. One dear friend in particular kept pointing me to where I needed to repent and I would just say, "I know, but I really need you to help me fix this". It finally occurred to me that Christ was the only one that could fix this stuff and He was graciously finding ways to point me back to Him every time I looked toward myself or others.

I think a lot of my sin has been/is being revealed, and I'm so thankful for it (not the sin, the revelation). I have been really overwhelmed trying to sort through my emotions and the sin in my heart, but I have been reminded time and time again that focusing on the cross and on my Savior is the only way to shed the sin, anger and pride that I've allowed to take over my heart.

I know that this is pretty heavy, but I just wanted to share a little bit of where I've been. God is so good, isn't He? I'm so excited to be in Heaven with Him someday away from the pain of this life! In the meantime, I will rejoice in the many blessings He has given! Even Especially the cute, whiny little baby who keeps snotting on my shirt. :)

Penny's First Birthday and Favorite Things post coming up...